Monday, July 20, 2015

True merit, like a river, the deeper it is, the less noise it makes.

3 days off; wish we were together; sometimes not; in person you talk too much; in digital work you are not; i wonder if we keep on going with the pace we are going where will this all lead; we talk about unnecessary petty stuff; what you do; what you had for breakfast, lunch, dinner; where you go; how's your day; never in depth feeling; not that kind of way; usually polite; usually boring; usually unexciting; i still do not know exactly what you do; does it matter? you will be away for 3 weeks; i have everything and i do not have everything; too many confusions; i agree; i disagree; i dont know what i want; maybe i just want you; i just want us and that is all; that will be all. 

Sunday, July 19, 2015

The influence of each human being on others in this life is a kind of immortality. .

as i was telling her; i have not been beaten up in so many of my past relationships; where did it bring me? what does it give me? what have i achieved? nothing; not a single fulfilling contented loving caring relationship; so that the only one who ever beat me up and scare me to death is back in my life now; what have i got to lose? nothing; perhaps just another unfulfilled un-contented unloving uncaring relationship.

Saturday, July 18, 2015

There is only one real failure in life that is possible, and that is, not to be true to the best one knows.

hey you; i appreciate your care; it is my fault for i have not told you the whole truth; it is very hard and unfair to judge and comment when you did not know the whole story; and yet you did; because i am a friend and you care about me; for that; i want to tell you that - i love you.

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

What was hard to bear is sweet to remember.

it's just that from now on maybe we can only talk about really shallow stuff, which is sad.

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are, and doing things as they ought to be done.

hey. just to let you know i didn't forget about you. if i dont get to see you before you leave. have a good trip. be safe.

hi. i know you didn't. i think of you often. ill be safe.



Thursday, July 9, 2015

I have simply tried to do what seemed best each day, as each day came.

You have a RED personality! According to Dr. Carol Ritberger, this means that you're a "just get it done" kind of person. You are driven, competitive, and you like to be in control. You are very action-oriented, and you appreciate efficiency. Dr. Ritberger adds that as a Red, you typically hold stress and tension in your lower back.

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

Fear not for the future, weep not for the past.

I always create this outer layer so no one can get in, until they give up, walk away then i will smile and say, i knew it, all of them are the same, just to prove i am right, sickeningly. 

Friday, July 3, 2015

one last time.

really a roller-coaster ride; 5 years; less than ten times of meetings; we dont even talk much; but it is not the talking; he is back into my life; he spoke; i cried; he needed to fill his void and gap before hence the violence; both our feelings are still showing; we cant deny; hence the staying; my stubbornness; wonder why he is still into me; now he realizes a lot of things along the way; 5 years is a long time; why now? i keep on asking questions, pointless questions, to him it doesn't matter; he seems to remember everything; it's not the length of thing; it's the depth; he said even if he needs to peel me like an onion for the rest of his live; he is willing to and he wants to; no one forces him to; he said let it go; let's move on; give each other and give us another chance; he said he is happy; genuinely happy; no one has asked me to stay for so many times; i am not sure if this is what i want in my life; but at this down point of my life he walks in again; i take it as a sign; of something truthful and real; finally taking place and happen for one last time.

Thursday, July 2, 2015

you are...............

You are: The power of introverts.

On the outside you may appear quiet, but there’s a nonstop rollercoaster of ideas running through your mind. You simply think long and hard before you speak. Your extraordinary insights come when you’re given time to consider things on your own, which is why your five least favorite words are, "This is a group project."

he said something about me being the most misunderstood person, as if he really knows me and understand me. how i always act so tough outside but just a softie inside. i really really am.

Because of my title I was the first to enter here. I shall be the last to go out.

late night; full moon; a digital aquarium; nice cool pool; we are all alone; spending time together albeit short; we met, we hugged and we kissed goodbye.

always good to see old friend.

"smile", you said and that is all i need.


Wednesday, July 1, 2015

There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up.

i would be lying if i say i dont feel anything; the one thing that happened; im not using it to penalise you; it's just that when people say one thing in your life that scars you for life; that's the one thing; all you can think of is i dont give another chance; everyone deserves a second chance; time come and go; people grow but they dont change; they never do, that is my fear.

my fear.