Wednesday, October 28, 2015
Sunday, October 25, 2015
When you cannot make up your mind which of two evenly balanced courses of action you should take - choose the bolder.
Saturday, October 24, 2015
Friday, October 23, 2015
It is good to dream, but it is better to dream and work. Faith is mighty, but action with faith is mightier.
"you gotta increase your tolerance to bull-shit";
he told me;
and add "if it is worth it", as a disclaimer;
to me it is always worth it;
i always fall too hard;
slowly losing myself and changing myself in the process;
which i know is wrong;
in the end;
i let go;
because i dont want to be someone that i am not;
this i come to know myself a little bit too well;
Monday, October 19, 2015
Saturday, October 17, 2015
5 months gone, then took another two weeks to finally throw the towel and for him to move on.
Such a roller-coaster ride.
Then im still with a dear friend of mine, which i believe if we ever develop a long term relationship, thing will change between us. Im just never easy and a demanding person.
Then that's another new person, that i feel quite comfortable with knowing whatever he is going thru but i still feel to be want to be with him.
I don't know if i am making sense, marching towards the 37 year of my life, i never feel so sure that i am actually doing things right. Not for the first time. Secretly so.
Thursday, October 15, 2015
i know this is wrong; an affair that feels so right; the more i think about it; the more time we spend together; it may lead us to part; because i am not perfect; because i have my flaws; because we do not have enough time; because i didnt met you first; so many things we start to talk about; slowly i am letting you in; and then harder for me to let you go; the desire becomes addictive; i still can be coldhearted and get rid of you; when i want to; i hope.
Wednesday, October 14, 2015
Monday, October 12, 2015
Thursday, October 8, 2015
Wednesday, October 7, 2015
Tuesday, October 6, 2015
Monday, October 5, 2015
you say you are coming back; that we were good; i dont feel that at all; how odd; i just feel unusually calm; simply because i hide and dodge; because the more i say and explain the more it seems like an excuse; it is indeed revealing; so now you know who and how i am; that i am not worth your time; that you are chasing after an empty dream; i hope the time and energy that you have invested in building something better lasted even after i am not there to share it; if not for anyone that do it for yourself which you should anyway; i never meant to share your glory anyway; i am not qualified; i am a coward; i am infamous in blocking; to that you should not be surprise at all; i am not saying i am right; i mean just to prove my point anyway; i just a useless bitch; drama queen; just to prove everyone will eventually walk away from; as i do this to myself.