Sunday, January 20, 2013

When we accept tough jobs as a challenge to our ability and wade into them with joy and enthusiasm, miracles can happen.














im just gonna say straight whatever in my mind, ok?

i enjoyed our time together, exchanging letters & sex is so good, but there's gotto be more than sex. i dont know about u a lot and i for sure dont know how you feel coz we dont actually talk about them, i remember last time when we chat online we talk even more back then, now we just dont anymore. one thing is i know myself good enough and what i also know is i want to get to know you better and see how this goes in order to confirm there is a feeling we have for each other then for us to explore if there is a possibility for us to be together or to see if we are the someone right for each other, because if we dont know that first, nothing else really matters.

im just not sure if you are also feeling the same or you might not feel the same or you think we are actually already doing something about it, just maybe i dont feel so. i dont want to presume and put pressure to anything, maybe our definition and opinion on things are totally different, thats why i wanna find out.

what is your definition anyway, just to see each other once a week and most of the time when we meet we cant wait but jump on each other to have this amazing love making session, afterwards we might cuddle a little bit, then wash up, have a brief dinner and went on our separate ways. there's no text, no call, no communication thereafter to tell me how you are, to tell me how your day is, whats your plans are, etc. im too coward to make the move afraid that i might freak you out, scare you away as a clingy and sticky person.

i dont know what we are and where we are, ill always remember that first kiss in the sea of people, where i thought that could possibly lead to something, maybe i was wrong or maybe i never ask or maybe im not even the type of girl you like to begin with. i dont want to scare you away. i dont know what it means when you call me baby, sweetie or whatever kind of nick name that i thought people only call each other when they are together and in love, maybe you call everybody that.

for now i can tell you that i cant and i dont want to be another woman that you just sleep with, the emptiness i feel afterwards everytime i met you is very hard to bear.

i really dont know who you are but i know who i am, i miss you and i wanna to be with you. im just not sure what are we actually doing, do you? just be honest with me & share with me how u feel, im a big girl; i can take it. i just need to know the truth, even if this is all just for sex.



your sincerely,
me

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