Sunday, October 23, 2016

Don’t do it. Don’t love me.

23102016; 1815; i just finished a shower getting ready for your call; because i thought you will be calling 1900 my time - 1300 yours; then a missed call; i called back; i can see you are tired; you do not care; speaker phone on and we were chatting away; you said i made you happy; that you do not want to forget me; i told you if there's ever a day you want to do that; please just lie to me and leave; we talk briefly for about 20 minutes; missing each other very much; i thought i have forgotten the feeling; but every time when we chat it comes back; we were just talking casually about your family; a restaurant you have been to with someone has worked there for a long time; mundane normal petty stuff; i told you about my run and study; a strong urge just to hold on to each other - "do't do it, don't love me"; one day some day eventually i will be able to tell you that; for real.

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