Monday, January 4, 2016

I understand that nobody understands me, but I can’t be someone I’m not.

we head out for dinner; something hold you back at work and we were not able to get sushi for dinner; i dont mind; my past relationship trained me to be more patience; less anxious; try to be calm; we joke and had a good laugh; then we were together again alone; with fantastic jazz music selection; there is line still i dont cross; there's boundaries that i will not push; you say you like me and you need me very much; i wonder why; you still keep on talking about your wife; you mention about being a boyfriend and even a husband; how can that be? i am old enough to not fall for this kind of serious joke; i talk to you about how all my past relationships suck and how i am keeping you from my friend because what is there to tell them when i can not even convince myself we are having a genuine real relationship that we can expose; you want to know i am being myself; i understand that; this is not anyone's fault; this is the choice that we make; that we want to be together at this very exact moment; you said you are keeping surprise for me; i couldn't wait; you share with me songs; you left the book there on the table so you can come back; you never need any excuses anyway; you can always come back; come back; even you always beat me at the nose game.

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