You make my stiff heart know that I am yours.

I can ask questions and you have the right not to answer.

That is the line.

Don’t tell them too much about your soul. They’re waiting for just that.

you said it has nothing to do with the trip;
you told me something embarrassed;
a family affair;
that i rarely interfere;
i asked a question;
you did not answer;
i push once;
still no answer;
i stop instantly;
we still contemplating;
we want to see us;
i wonder the repercussion of what happened;
how would that affect you;
did she send it to you which she supposed to;
that she did not and to him;
he is not even attractive;
what would she think;
in this most fragile moment;
she needs your tenderness more than ever;
all this inside of my head;
spinning and spinning;
non stop;
but me missing you;
also going on the same rate;
i ask you what is this relationship means to you;
you said: a lot;
that is enough for me;
truly, madly, deeply.

We shall meet in the place where there is no darkness.

you are glad and happy that i am telling my friend about you;
but it;s because she is in the same situation;
you know this is not something i am totally proud of;
in a way you cant do the same under the circumstances;
in your voice there seem to be a little bit of disappointment that you cant do so;
then comes now;
that i realise;
you can share with me embarrassing affair that you will not be able to share with anyone, ever;

that makes us even now;
in a weird odd way. 

The best way I can love you is by not losing myself in you, but growing with you.

She is not around again;
you just reached home;
settle down, shower, you called, we chat;
i cried again;
feel sad;
but i made you more happy;
but maybe i make you more sad;
i will not know;
i can not guess;
i do not want to ask you hard question;
about what you would say to her;
about how you are with her;
then about the trip;
far and yet so close trip;
you have found a trip where we both do not need to travel so long;
i am flattered by your thoughts and invite;
i hesitated and finally decide to refuse for the right reason;
both you and i know it this is the right decision;
there is just too much at stake even though we do not talk about it;
you don't need to think anymore about the trip;
don't feel bad or anything;
sometimes someone in this kind of situation needs to make a call;
even if it's not a call I would want to make.

Thank you for the so many things and so many thoughts you have had for me and done for me;
for this i truly feel loved.

I usually solve problems by letting them devour me.

i let him go and turn him down just to get closer to you;
we still keeping our chit chat albeit we both far away;
you are going home;
flight delay;
seeing your family;
have good time;
all this within a short period of time;
frustrated about the planning;
could have been done better;
i left you on Wednesday;
board again on Saturday;
already he said he wants to meet again on Sunday;
as usual i think too much;
as usual i think of other;
as usual i think why the hurry;
as usual;
as usual;
as usual;
i cant explain.

I’m really a very happy, contented little person in spite of my broken heart.

i was glad;
it was the right decision;
she made it here early;
we have similar challenges and issues;
she enjoying her time here;
we could talk about it all night; all day; all the time;
cheer to you AL, this friendship i so very much cherish.

I will love you the exact way I always wanted to be loved.

still shy;
still did not push it thru;
first night arrive late;
we joke about it;
i was gullible;
i greeted you;
you were tired;
you slept more;
day 1 - then we headed out to a temple nearby;
the temple was surrounded by a lake;
we had a Starbucks too;
we walked around the park;
see all the performers around;
had a piece of fried chicken;
it was a nice day;
then we wanted to have a beer;
small dinner;
we ended in the small jap restaurant in a corner;
day 2 - we got up;
usual time;
we book the tour;
then get on our way to the north;
visited a big bell tower temple;
we then rushed on a bus;
randomly touring around;
ended up in a small bar street;
had my beer in a french cafe;
then we walk thru old street;
found interesting stuff to look around;
i wanted it to be special;
had in my head a visual;
it did not happen;
i know why;
i did not push it;
i want to be in control;
i want to know where i stand and what i bring to this relationship;
day 3 - we had the arranged trip;
saw another old couple;
guessing it's an affair;
we can only guess;
what will other think of us;
i wonder;
you enjoy us as a normal couple too;
im more eager to feel with you different things;
to still explore you; know you;
day 4 - in the nicest hotel of the trip;
did not stay long or talk;
hang out had beer;
walk around lake a bit;
bicycle fail;
a lot of things fail;
but enjoyable time nonetheless;
did not had our bath;
drink a little wine;
call it a night;
day 5 - check in again the second hotel;
settle down;
went to old street again;
had cold drinks;
people watching;
normal conversation;
you had asked me to tell you something, two times;
i feel like we run out of things to say;
we limit ourselves;
i do not want to do the things you could do with them;
what is the difference?
i wonder then;
i wonder now;
i will forever can only wonder;
to no end.

You do not have to unburden your soul for everyone; it will be enough if you do that for those you love.

you missed a day;
i have been waiting for this moment;
city is empty without you;
finally it was over;
we back to our world;
still shy;
still think i am not entitle to request and ask for more;
this time it felt more sexually driven;
i wanted to talk;
i did not insist;
you missed the sign;
i have my expectations;
everyone could have;
it is very normal in a relationship;
if this you can do it with her;
why would you do it with me;
what is so special?
i did not feel special;
i have in my mind - candle light dinner; give you the gift; talk about it more; about our relationship; to assess it; do we want to go on; am i doing you more good than harm;
you send me a song;
that says makes you better;
how can it be if someone already made it;
where is my position in your life;
what can i be?
we have been waiting so long for this moment;
and yet;
it feels so different this time around;
i want it as it is;
that i can always feel sure being with you is the good thing;
is the only thing that makes me want to be with you.